I feel like I’ll never meet that guy who can make my heart stop, who can be my best friend.I refuse to be with anyone if I don’t feel passionate towards them.
“My desires in a relationship have changed over time. I no longer want someone who promises to always love me and never leave me, I need someone who understands that life happens and sometimes things don’t work out. I don’t want someone who sugar coats things and never gets angry with me, I need someone to tell me how it really is and put me in my place. I need to be able to go five hours without talking to you and not feel lost or incomplete. I am complete without you. But with you, I want to be so much better. I want to be stronger with you. I want us to grow together and help each other grow individually. I don’t need you, but I really fucking want you. And this may not work out, but the fact that you understand all of this and this how our relationship works, makes me think we’ve got a pretty good shot.”
“When guys cheat, they don’t leave the girl they’re with to be with a girl who’s better. They find a girl who is easy. If a man is looking to cheat it’s because the relationship he is in is hard. It’s commitment. It’s work. So they find a girl who puts them back on a fake pedestal, who makes life seem simple. It’s all fake. It’s all deceitful. It’s all selfish. But that’s why girls who get cheated on should never compare themselves to the mistress. It has nothing to do with looks or personality or connection. It’s that the guy was looking for easy.”
I'm married and I'm messing with a married man. A few days ago he told me he has caught feelings. I did fall in love with him but I can't bring myself to tell him in fear that he may be playing with my emotions. We've been messing around for almost three years, is it possible he is telling the truth?
It’s possible. But you shouldn’t get a divorce because you caught feelings for the person you’re cheating with. Here’s why:
This analogy may seem weird at first, but humor me for a second.
You know how children always love their aunts and uncles? Aunts and uncles are fun because they buy you stuff, they’re always happy to see you. They’re not always on your case about shit like your parents.
Aunts and Uncles are fun because they only have to see you when they want to. They don’t have to deal with you 24hrs a day, feed you, clothe you, discipline you, make you do homework. They aren’t your parents so they don’t have the responsibility of the dirty work. That’s why they seem so great.
This nigga you’re cheating with is an “uncle”.
He’s not tasked with the dirty work. Managing bills with you, running a home with you. Smelling your period farts when its that time of the month. Seeing you looking busted when you take that sew in out and don’t have any makeup on.
Your husband deals with that shit on the daily. Your husband represents real life and the not-so-fun things that come with it. That’s why the side nigga seems so great. Your side nigga is a vacation from the responsibilities in your real life.
I’m not telling you not to cheat. I’m just telling you not to throw away your marriage for greener pastures. Because if you do… your side nigga won’t be the “uncle” anymore… Things won’t be so great. And you might regret your decision.
